May Margaret was born at 1:10am on Saturday the 31st July, only one hour past her due date.

My first labour with my daughter, Tabitha, who is now 5, was long and difficult as she was posterior and despite my determination, her delivery was assisted. My labour with May was a complete contrast. I was so keen to deliver this baby on my own, without assistance or drugs and that is what attracted me to Calmbirthing as I saw it as a way of achieving this…..if all else went according to plan, of course!

Approaching May’s birth there were some questions around her size and low levels of amniotic fluid. We had an ultrasound that confirmed this and some discussions were had around a need to induce the baby if it wasn’t here by the due date. My obstetrician was very supportive of my desire to go into labour naturally but I also had to consider medical circumstances, particularly around the fluid levels, tempering this with my aversion to induction.

I had been having acupuncture specifically to prepare my body for labour and I was drinking mountains of Raspberry Leaf Tea (not the nicest tasting stuff!). Considering the levels of fluid, 10 days before my due date, the acupuncture was revved up to encourage contractions.

I visited my obstetrician, Malcolm Barnett, two days before my due date and requested an examination. I was very pleased to find out I was 3cm dilated, and at my request, was given a ‘stretch and sweep’ (yes, it is as uncomfortable as it sounds, my breathing came in handy!) to encourage things along. I instantly had a contraction. Very mild contractions continued for the next three days. Every night I said goodnight to the kids and told them I might not be there in the morning, but of course, I was!

Friday afternoon I decided to hurry things along and went for a vigorous walk. I had only walked about 20 metres when I had to stop for a stronger contraction….instant success. Halfway around the block, my phone rang. It was a friend from kinder who had also done Calmbirthing and had had her baby the night before. She called specifically to share her birthing story, which was wonderfully positive. This put me in the right frame of mind and my contractions continued to get stronger. My mum and dad were over for dinner and although my contractions were getting steadily stronger, we sent my mum home about 9pm, thinking we could be in for a long night. I had a shower to get ready for bed at about 9:30 and had a ‘show’ and more contractions…..it occurred to me that I had better start timing them and I was surprised to find they were 3 and 4 minutes apart. I called the hospital, even though I wanted to stay home, and they told me I had better think about coming in soon, warning me that 2nd babies come faster than 1sts!

We called mum back to our house at 10pm and arrived at the hospital about 10:30. Of course everything immediately slowed down, but it wasn’t long and it was all back again. The midwife told me that Malcolm was on his way to deliver another baby in the next room. After about an hour and a half things were getting pretty intense so I decided I needed something to help me manage and I asked for a bath. To my surprise, the midwife told me that I needed to wait for the obstetrician to see me first. I kept asking for a bath and she kept saying that Malcolm wasn’t far away. To appease me, she went and ran the bath. She told me later that she wouldn’t let me have a bath as she knew I wasn’t far off delivering! By this stage I was having difficulty relaxing my body, but was using the concept of ‘surrender’ to still allow my body to do its thing. I also found it very helpful to breathe through my contractions and kept thinking of Sue’s concept that if you breathe slowly and count, you only have a few breaths to do before the contraction is over. I was also very surprised by the sounds that came out of my body, I am sure I sounded like a cow birthing a calf (very animalistic!) but it was totally involuntary and I said to Thom “Don’t you ever tell anyone that I made these noises!”.

My obstetrician arrived and my first question was ‘how much longer do I have to do this?’ I think he was only there for a few contractions and then (again, completely involuntarily) I began to push. Malcolm commented “It sounded like you were pushing.” I responded with “I think I was. I didn’t mean it.” Next thing there was a popping sound and my waters broke- a very strange sensation! Malcolm told me to do what my body was telling me. I was very surprised when Malcolm went and got his apron and gloves on and then told me he could see a head! It all seemed so quick compared to my previous experience. At 1:10am our daughter was born. I have a very distinct memory of Malcolm saying “Look down, Bronya, don’t miss it, you don’t want to miss this” as he lifted her out and straight onto my stomach.

As a bonus, we were so pleased to have another girl as that is what we had wanted and Tabitha was desperate to have a little sister.

May stayed on my chest for an hour, waking up and beginning to look around. It was dark and peaceful and we were astounded by the miracle of it all and able to completely focus on her. After about an hour she started to really wake up and show an interest in feeding. We left her on my chest and watched in awe as she licked and moved around for about 15 minutes and then self-attached for her first feed….. a very precious moment.

Malcolm was so respectful of our birth wishes and did the newborn checks right beside me on the bed, after May had fed, with everything still dark and quiet. We didn’t bath her or weigh her until the next day…she wasn’t small at all, she was 7.4 pounds/ 3.310kg, exactly the same as Tabitha.

Life with three kids all at very different ages and stages (Lucas is 13, Tabitha is 5 and of course our newborn May) is keeping us fairly busy. The kids just love May and there are lots of willing helpers wanting to hold her after each feed. We feel so blessed by all our children and a wonderful birth experience with May was just the icing on the cake!

We are grateful to Sue and the whole concept of Calmbirth for allowing us to approach our birth without fear and with a happy and positive outcome in mind.

Warmest regards to you all and best wishes for the precious early days with your little ones,

Bronya and Thom.